Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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