You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I just blew my weed a kiss
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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