well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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