so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
