afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
