We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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