Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize