I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
