the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
