I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
