And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
You are the jesus of drinking
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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