There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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