Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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