Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
