can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
whose parrot is this?
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
