I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
