It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I don't think brook has ever known best
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
