I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
