i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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