That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Randomize
