The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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