I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
The feeling are messing with the penis
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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