It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
