Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
