Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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