he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
The dick lei will go down in squad history
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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