Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
