I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I'm sobbing to NWA
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
