I didn't shave. On purpose
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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