I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Randomize
