lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
