The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
