Plan B is the new Plan A
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
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