...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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