You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Randomize