He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
