I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize