Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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