IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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