when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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