please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
