he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
We are all done wearing pants today
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