PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I had to cum in my sink.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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