Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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