So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Randomize