You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I'm too high and old for this...
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
