her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
