Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
do herpes really smell.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Randomize