Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
