i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Randomize
