the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
