problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize
